[ Cisco uses that pause; he closes his eyes, covers his face with his hands, and just focuses on deep breaths. He and Genji had practiced this together, enough times that Cisco had joked about it being excessive. But Genji had been right. All that practice meant it was easier, to repeat that process now, when he really needs it.
After a solid two minutes, Cisco texts back: ]
okay you're right i'm working on deep breaths i just feel so helpless
[ Cisco doesn't think of himself as a control freak, typically, but this kind of powerlessness is terrifying to him. ]
i didn't vibe though the whole time he was in surgery i didn't have a panic attack or vibe
[ He does think that part of that might be because of that strange feeling of detachment and unreality, but... maybe that's at least a little better, than outright terror would have been. Sure, it was unsettling, that feeling of calm. It probably wouldn't be healthy long term. But it got him through. ]
no subject
[ Cisco uses that pause; he closes his eyes, covers his face with his hands, and just focuses on deep breaths. He and Genji had practiced this together, enough times that Cisco had joked about it being excessive. But Genji had been right. All that practice meant it was easier, to repeat that process now, when he really needs it.
After a solid two minutes, Cisco texts back: ]
okay
you're right
i'm working on deep breaths
i just feel so helpless
[ Cisco doesn't think of himself as a control freak, typically, but this kind of powerlessness is terrifying to him. ]
i didn't vibe though
the whole time he was in surgery
i didn't have a panic attack or vibe
[ He does think that part of that might be because of that strange feeling of detachment and unreality, but... maybe that's at least a little better, than outright terror would have been. Sure, it was unsettling, that feeling of calm. It probably wouldn't be healthy long term. But it got him through. ]